Category: God

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God

Life Pointe Church Sunday Morning Tossed Salad

It was another glorious Sunday morning at Life Pointe Church in Homestead Florida. Here are my takeaways in 15 words or less:

– God said ‘Let there be rain !’, and so it did – if only for a few minutes.
– The 9 AM service was a bit more crowded this week than last week.
– Everyone must be on the same Daylight Saving Time zone now.
– Mike B. led ‘Praise & Worship’ as we all sang to God and He listened.
– Mark S. hosted during that first service, and he was loud and confident.
– It was his best hosting performance to date.
– He later revealed that he had been up since 1 PM yesterday.
– I’m thrilled that he’s blogging again. I need the company.
– Dan B. led the teaching this morning for the first time ever.
– He did an outstanding job leading us through His Good News.
– If I’m on trial for obeying God would there be enough evidence for conviction ?
– I will never ever be just like Jesus Christ.
– I will however move to become more and more like Him.
– I must continue to grow towards His likeness.
– I must continue to permit God to mold me in His likeness.
– God should be able to easily reach me.
– I must protect myself from evil and darkness and those who relish in it.
– I do not wish to go back where I came from nearly 31 months ago.
– I do not wish to be a puppet of this world.
– I wish to see what’s around the corner for me on God’s fantastic journey.
– Stay away Satan. You did nothing for me. I have no use for you.
– This morning’s teaching was based on the following 28 verses:
   – 1 Timothy 4:7-8
   – Romans 12:1-2
   – 1 Corinthians 15:32-34
   – Philippians 4:8-9
   – Galatians 5:22-23
   – 1 Corinthians 11:1
   – 2 Peter 1:3
   – 1 Timothy 6:6-20
– This is my favourite – Romans 12:1-2:
A Living Sacrifice to God
1  And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all He has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice — the kind He will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship Him.
2  Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

Categories
God Humor

Bible Stories

Through The Eyes Of A Child:  The Childrens’ Bible In A Nutshell

In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, ‘The Lord thy God is one’, but I think He must be a lot older than that.

Anyway, God said, ‘Give me a light !’, and someone did. Then God made the world.

He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren’t embarrassed because mirrors hadn’t been invented yet.

Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden. Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn’t have cars.

Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel.

Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.

One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check.

After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.

Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh’s people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.

God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments.

These include:  Don’t lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor’s stuff. Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more:  Humor thy father and thy mother.

One of Moses’ best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.

After Joshua came David. He got to be King by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn’t sound very wise to me.

After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore. There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don’t have to worry about them.

After the Old Testament came the New Testament.. Jesus is the star of The New. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn.

(I wish I had been born in a barn too, because my mom is always saying to me, ‘Close the door !  Were you born in a barn ?’ It would be nice to say, ‘As a matter of fact, I was.’)

During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Democrats.

Jesus also had twelve opossums. The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.

Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount.

But the Democrats and all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn’t stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead.

Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again. He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.

Categories
Blogging God Life Travel

Blatant Promotion

TONIGHT I spent a couple of fun hours with about 20 or so of my closest brothers and sisters on this fantastic journey. We hung out at the house of J.T. and Anne J., and we ate a wide variety of food, talked, laughed, hugged, solved some of the problems of the world today, and played games. It was probably the most loud and rambunctious fellowship that I’ve ever experienced, and I loved every single second of it. I can’t wait to do it again real soon.

This Saturday morning a bunch of us are heading down U.S. 1 for about 130 miles to Key West. Once we get there we’ll be participating in a very special edition of ‘The Major’s Bike-A-Thon’ all around the island. Be sure to read all about our adventures late on Saturday night once we all return back home from that.

In the meantime I’ve got an all-new ‘Bible Stories’ planned for Wednesday night as well as an intriguing ‘Thursday Night Mini Thoughts’ and the always dependable ‘Friday Night Blogroll Review’. Be sure to post your finest blog entries of the week between now and then for consideration of the ‘Major Bloggie Award’.

Until we hang out again here on the big green blog take good care of yourselves – and each other.

Categories
God

Life Pointe Church Sunday Morning Tossed Salad

Here are my takeaways in 15 words or less:

– Daylight Saving Time is here, and most of our attendance was still asleep.
– Among The Thirsty was our house band this morning.
– They seriously rocked my face off !
– They have a big radio single out called “One Sound”.
– It’s from their big album called “Wonder”.
– They did a tremendous job leading us as we all sang to God.
– During the first service Communications Director Kelly D. hosted.
– She’s quickly developing into an efficient leader at Life Pointe Church.
– Have you seen her cool new blog ?  It’s at kellydowning.com.
– Kelly D. is on my car radio every morning as I drive to work.
– I get to listen to her for about 15 minutes every morning.
– She’s my favourite radio deejay !
– Mark S. did the teaching for the first time ever.
– It was an awesome effort.
– He taught us all about forgiveness.
– Forgiven people forgive people.
– You’re not justifying their actions when you forgive someone.
– You should always remember how much you have been forgiven.
– You should reflect on who you need to forgive.
– You should release the other person(s) from your grudges.
– You should forgive instantly, completely, freely, and repeatedly.
– There should be no ‘ifs’ and no limits to your forgiveness.
– Jesus placed no ‘ifs’ and no limits so that you could be forgiven.
– It’s all about God’s purpose in the forgiveness process.
– I was rescued and saved by God over 30 months ago.
– Before this journey started I didn’t know how to forgive people.
– I carried grudges deep down inside for years and even decades.
– I even denied the mere existence of some of these grudges.
– How could I forgive someone if they never did anything bad to me ?
– But they did – and I have.
– This morning’s teaching was based on 17 verses from the Good News:
  – Matthew 18:22
  – Colossians 2:13-14
  – Psalm 103:12
  – 1 John 1:9
  – Matthew 5:25-26
  – Psalm 139:3-4
  – Matthew 18:32-35
  – Romans 12:18-19
  –  2 Corinthians 3:17
  – Colossians 3:13

Be sure to catch my buddy Phil’s take on this morning’s events at Life Pointe Church. This morning he was dressed up in his ‘Sunday finest’, and that’s ironic considering he wrote this ‘Major Bloggie Award Winner’ earlier in the week !