Category: Health

Walmart: It’s What’s For Breakfast

Post author By Chris M. Day
Post date October 24, 2008

So I’m officially at home today (Friday) on sick leave. As an employee of the Department Of Defense I’ve accumulated well over 1,300 hours of sick leave (about 166 work days), so I’m using a minuscule percentage (0.6%) of my sick leave today.

I really am sick today. This is officially Day 3 of my 7TH cold in 12 months, but unofficially it’s Day 5 because I felt something bad coming on as early as Monday. On Wednesday the right-hand side of my nose was closed for business. Yesterday it had a soft reopening, but then the left-hand side of my nose had its share of problems. Today both sides are equally experiencing technical difficulties. I also have a headache (due to excess sinus pressure), partially-blocked ears, and occasional hot-flashes of sweat.

So I set out (rather late) this morning to eat a MASSIVE breakfast over at Denny’s of Florida City (where all of the food is). That didn’t happen because when I got there the parking lot was crammed to capacity (like I’ve never seen it before), so I just kept on driving by.

At that precise moment in time and space I made a spur-of-the-moment decision to go to Walmart of all places (also in Florida City – where all of the commercial merchandise is). It was the first time that I had set foot in that store in years ! The joint has changed a lot since I was last there. It’s cleaner, more organized, and brighter now. They must have all-new management in place now because this is not the same scary Walmart that I used to set foot in every few years. This supercenter is now shoppable ! I spent nearly an hour there. I even bought a few groceries there in addition to a lovely birthday gift that I bought for one of my little buddies whose party I plan to attend tomorrow morning (health-permitting).

I must say though that Walmart’s grocery prices are nothing to sneeze about. During a general price survey of the joint I realized that their prices are either slightly lower – or in some cases slightly higher than what I’m used to at Publix. I expected much lower prices, but I guess that with a nicer store to shop at they had to raise their prices a bit. I’ll probably shop there more often than I have in the past (more than once every two or three years).

I should have gotten breakfast at Walmart. They have an actual McDonald’s inside the joint !

Tags Denny's, Walmart

Health Humor

I’m Sick ! I Ate A Cricket !

Post author By Chris M. Day
Post date October 22, 2008
6 Comments on I’m Sick ! I Ate A Cricket !

‘The Major’s Health & Awareness Center’ has confirmed that as of 6 AM EDT this morning the concerned area of disturbed conditions within my face over the past couple of days has indeed formed a closed circulation center and thus intensified into Common Cold # 7 making it the unbelievably ridiculous 7TH cold for me over the past 12 months. This is also less than 4 weeks removed from the arrival of Common Cold # 6 back on Thursday September 25TH 2008.

A stay-at-home curfew warning is now in effect for my home, and all residents and living creatures of the right-hand side of my nose have been strongly advised to rush evacuation procedures to completion and move quickly over to the left-hand side of my nose that currently works properly. If current conditions shall continue to persist or deteriorate further then Common Cold # 7 could then be upgraded to Hurricold Gabriel.

Stay tuned to this blog channel for further updates as they occur.

Animals Blogging Driving Health Politics Weather

Tuesday Night Grab Bag O’ Thoughts

Post author By Chris M. Day
Post date October 21, 2008
6 Comments on Tuesday Night Grab Bag O’ Thoughts

With this edition of the flagship weekly series on this blog we begin the 2ND year of all-new thoughts on a Tuesday night. Who said this wouldn’t last more than 3 weeks ? Often imitated but never as durable I present this to you:

1. The rainy season has officially ended aqui en el Sur de Florida, and now we can look forward to delightful winter weather that residents of 48 other states (excluding Hawaii) can only dream of while we take it for granted. Having stated that – and how ironic – but we can expect occasional showers and perhaps even a stray thunderstorm or two at any time between now and Saturday night. The high humidity will return as well, but then on Sunday look out – sunny, much cooler, and definitely drier !

2. FINALLY ! AT LONG LAST ! I am seeing political ads on TV for the other half of us, and they are being presented by the Republican Jewish Coalition. I’m actually cheering these ads on (loudly) when I see them because I’m just happy to see anything for my side now after having been blasted by negative attack ads from the other side for way too many months now.

3. I’m hardly ever in a hurry when I drive from here to there, so I typically drive pretty close to the posted speed limit (unlike the other 8 out of 10 of you). Having stated that it just seems like whenever I do need to get from here to there just a little bit faster than normal everyone around me has decided that would be the perfect time to drive way too slow (below the posted speed limit) and box me in. Just my luck.

4. I may look like I’m 22, but I usually feel like I’m 32. I’m approaching 42, but this past Monday morning I actually felt like I was closer to 52. This was after a weekend in which I nonchalantly sprained my lower back while playing air hockey at Dave & Buster’s, got very little sleep on Saturday night, cut open my right index finger on Sunday morning, and then got very little sleep again on Sunday night. Oh yeah I also slept improperly so my entire right arm aches a bit when I try to raise it. This weekend I’ll be relaxing and recuperating peacefully anhd quietly at home.

5. Phil introduced me to Little Max (a Maltese dog) on Monday morning. Dogs don’t like me, but I think that Max did. P.J. and A.J. encouraged me to hold M.J., and once I hesitantly did so he wanted to take a quick nap in my hand. Max is lovable, but I could never be a master of a canine. It’s been about 33 years since my last dog was taken away from me. It was one of the most traumatic experiences of my entire childhood.